Support, Bereavement Awareness Months, Bereaved Parents Awareness Month, Bereaved Parents, bereavement counseling, personalized service, authors, meeting planners, conference organizers, workshop facilitators, seminar leaders, keynote speakers, Deb Kulkkula, Deborah Kulkkula, Peter Kulkkula

Coping with Grief

Remember, with support, patience and effort,
you will survive grief.
Some day the pain will lessen,
leaving you with cherished memories of your loved one.

Be Good to Yourself
Be Yourself - Truthfully
Accept Yourself - Gratefully
Value Yourself - Joyfully
Treat Yourself - Generously
Balance Yourself - Harmoniously
Bless Yourself - Abundantly
Trust Yourself - Confidently
Love Yourself - Wholeheartedly
Empower Yourself - Prayerfully
Give Yourself - Enthusiastically
Express Yourself - Radiantly

Coping with Grief:

Coping means “to contend with difficulties and act to overcome them.” Well, we can’t change the loss of our loved ones. But we can strive to develop our own set of coping tools to help us cope.

When we loss a loved one, it is the most stressful event and emotional crisis in our lives. You have become a bereaved person. Bereavement means "to be deprived by death." So, this is the time we need coping skills the most. Here’s our chance to improve them.

Learning the grief process and its roller coaster effect helps us know what to expect. Some of these emotions are denial, confusion, anger, despair, guilt, and numbness. These emotions and feelings like: we are going crazy, that we can't function, or that the world is spinning away from us are common reactions to lossing a loved one. It takes time to absorb the impact of this loss. Our moods may swiftly change. We may experience an overwhelming sense of injustice. After all, we have lost ourloved one's potential and unfulfilled dreams. In addition, we have endured senseless suffering. No matter how irrational it is, we may feel responsible for our loved one's death. We probably feel that we have lost a vital part of our
identity. The intensity and duration of our grief is magnified. The pain of losing a loved one will lessen and someday you will be able to build a new self. Our memories will keep our loved one alive in your broken hearts. We really won't stop missing our loved ones. But someday we'll be remembering our loved ones with more smiles then tears.

Here's what we might expect:
The roller coaster grief process is as individual as each of our lives. This roller coaster phases peak and withdraw, and then reappear when least expected. Sometimes our process even jumps off the track. Here are some of the phases that we may experience:
Denial: Upon hearing bad news, the most common reaction is a feeling of numbness or shock. We may experience disbelief: "That is not possible … there must be some mistake … you must have the wrong person, the wrong medical records … that can't be true or happen to me!" The mind-body has incredible defense mechanisms. If we pretend that something isn’t true, then somehow the blow is softened. At any moment, our loved one could reappear, or so we imagine. Time seems to briefly suspend itself, at least until the cruel reality of the truth sets in.
Anger: We may get angry at the messenger who delivers the news, the doctor, the person who caused us this pain (even if that person is now deceased), at anyone we can hold responsible for our grief, even at God. This reaction is perfectly understandable. There is a need to know why this happened and whether the loss could have been prevented. “Who is at fault?” we question. Somehow pointing the finger allows us to divert the pain from the core of our being where it rises up and threatens to overwhelm us. Others may turn their anger inwards and blame themselves for what happened.
Bargaining: We may try to negotiate the situation, either with another person involved, or with God: "Please give me one more chance and I promise things will be better … I will change … If you will reverse this, then I will ___ in return." This is kind of magical thinking where we believe our actions will meet with the desired outcome. Some people attempt to strike a deal with their Higher Power: to stop smoking, to find more time to spend with family, to offer an apology that’s long overdue. At some point, though, we face our limitations in holding up our end of the
deal. No matter what we say or do, the bitter truth is that things will not go back to the way they were before. And that’s when the next phase hits.
Depression: When we realize the loss is real and unchanging, we may sink into a deep sorrow. Though Dr. Kübler-Ross dubbed this phase ‘depression,’ it is more accurate to describe it as more a combination of loss and loneliness and perhaps hopelessness. We may feel remorse or regret, rehearsing over and over what we could have done differently. Or perhaps we feel guilty that we are still able to enjoy life while our loved one no longer can. This intense
experience of sadness leaves us with sparse energy for housework or outside activities. It is common to find ourselves sobbing over the smallest little thing or crying for days on end. Whether or not we have a terminal illness, we may feel our life is over. Some may consider or attempt ending their lives.
Acceptance: Time will not heal our wounds. We may miss being able to share our life with that person, no matter how long it’s been since they died. We don’t have to forget how much our loved one means to us in order to move on. If we can come to terms with the reality of the situation, recognize it as a fact of our lives, and gradually let go of the struggle against the tide of emotions that we experience, we can move beyond our suffering. Even with our new
circumstances, we can find peace within ourselves.
We may recognize some of our highs and lows in this roller coaster grief process. Here are some of the feelings that we may have and things that we may do during your bereavement:
Our Loss
Total Devastation
Opposition
Feelings: Shock, Denial, Disbelief, Hostility, Anger at Others, at Self, and at the Situation, Numbness
Actions: Crying, Weakness, Sleep Disturbances, Physical Pain, Nausea, Loss of Appetite, Loss of Desire to Action, Bargaining
Examination
Feelings: Confusion, Denial, Guilt
Actions: Questioning Fate and One's Intellect, Emotions, Body, Faith
Hopelessness
Feelings: Grief, Depression, Jealousy, Agony, Despair, Anguish, Resentment, Yearning, Reduced Self Esteem
Actions: Regressed Thinking, Slowed Actions, More Physical Symptoms, Excessive Activity, Desire to Recuperate the Loss, Eating to Little, Eating to Much
Separation
Feelings: Apathy, Crave Detachment/Withdrawal, Indifference, Urge to “Give Up,” Loss of Interest
Actions: Socialization Dwindles, Insipid Facial Expression, Dull Body Expression, No Spontaneity, No New Friendships
Reorganization
Feelings: Sadness, Humiliation, Fatigue, Intermittent Interest, Bursts of Energy, Indifference, Detachment, Acceptance
Actions: Going Back to Work, Beginning to Vacation Again, Reaching Out to Others, Inability to Do What we Did Before
Reinvestment
Finding Hope for Healing, Beginning to Help Others, Finding a New Direction in Life, Beginning to Build Our New Selves, Finding Joy Again
What are some strategies to cope with grief after the loss of a loved one?
Death is part of life; hanging on will not prolong your loved one’s life or bring them back.
Letting go and surrendering to the grieving experience, with the help of others, will bring comfort and solace.
Here are some other areas in which you can ‘grieve well’ or healthily grieve:
Self-expression
Physical self-care
Emotional self-care
Good social support
One of the key elements of healthy grieving is allowing your emotions to surface in order to work
through them. In the long run, trying to stuff down your feelings—in the belief that they will simply fade with time—is counter-productive. When ignored, grief causes pain that is sometimes so excruciating that people want to numb and escape it through alcohol or medications. But in blocking the grieving process you block the natural return to interest and meaning in life that follows the grieving process.
Take care of yourself through self-expression Talk. You deserve to express yourself at this difficult time, even though others may discourage or even reprimand you for having a strong emotional reaction. Talk about your loved
one to others or to God (and encourage them to do so, too). If they are uncomfortable, gently let them know that part of your healing process is getting it off your chest.
Write. Start or continue writing in a journal or diary. You may want to compose a letter to the deceased person to describe how you feel and ‘say’ things you never got to say. Some questions to write about: how would you spend the rest of your life if you only had a short time to live? Would you say or do things differently? Be as honest as possible about how you feel.
Create. You may want to create a special collage or other artistically-inspired memento about your loved one, like a scrapbook. For those who are beginner artists, you can use memorabilia items or something symbolic like seashells. In the process, your thoughts and feelings may become clearer as you provide a creative outlet for expression. This exercise also may bring up other feelings.
Remember. Let this be an opportunity to reflect on the good times. Looking back, what do you appreciate about the contributions of your loved one? What are the moments together that you cherish the most? Do things to honor and remember your loved one: if they loved flowers, plant a garden in their honor or help others plant gardens; support the causes and organizations that were important to your loved one.
Take good physical care of yourself
Get enough sleep. A regular sleep routine will be beneficial. If you are tired during the day, give yourself a chance to sit or lie down. Resting your body will help your emotional recovery. A restful night’s sleep is important. Sleep is adversely affected by caffeine, medications, heavy smoking, alcohol, and exercise just before you go to bed.
Avoid chemicals. Though you may crave a chemical to help you get through this time, try your best to steer clear of substances like alcohol, caffeine, nicotine, because their side effects can be unhelpful in the long-term. For instance, instead of coffee, opt for green tea, which is less jolting to your energy.
Exercise regularly. If you are physically able, take a brisk walk in the morning or at lunchtime. Choose something that will motivate you to get out of bed. Whether you feel like it or not, get some sort of physical exercise every day.
Eat well. Even if it’s the furthest thing from your mind, pay attention to the quality of what you eat. Take the time to eat nutritious meals while sitting down, avoiding processed or ‘fast’ food (even though you may be pressed for time and not feel like cooking).
Take care of yourself emotionally
Have fun. Is there a book that you have wanted to read or a movie you haven’t had time to see? This is the time to do it. Whether it’s listening to uplifting music or getting a massage, do what makes you happy. Even though you may feel guilty about being pampered at this time, you deserve to treat yourself well.
Forgive. The death of someone you love brings an end to opportunity to communicate. You may be reminded of the need to forgive that person for a past hurt—and forgive yourself if need be—then move on. Maybe you said something you regret. Perhaps you wish you had done more at the time. In your grief, you may have felt embarrassed, guilty or angry (which is completely understandable). Let yourself off the hook and apply that energy into something positive.
Plan ahead. Anniversaries and holidays bring their own particular challenges. You may feel especially emotional a year after your loved one dies, on their birthday or another significant marker. Attending an event such as a graduation, wedding or funeral can be highly charged, as well. This is a completely normal reaction. In order to prepare, talk to other members of your family to find out what their expectations are. Decide together how you would like to change your traditions while honoring the memory of your loved one.
Get the support you need. There are people who want to help you get through this time—friends, loved ones, pastoral counselors, bereavement counselor, trained laypersons and professionals.
Often people want to help, but don’t know what to do.
Accept help that feels good.
It’s alright to tell people who want to help how they can best help you.
One of the most helpful things might be to prepare healthy meals for you.
Some people can take time to just listen and hold you as you cry.
A good friend might even laugh with you, in the midst of your pain.
It is important to have an outlet for sharing grief, even for people who aren’t usually comfortable talking about their feelings. Humans are social creatures and knowing that others know and understand will make you feel better, less alone with your pain. Many support groups exist for the general public as well as specific populations, such as grieving parents and suicide survivors. Whatever the nature of your loss, connecting with others will help you heal. You will know how far you’ve come when you can share another’s pain and know the possibility of recovery.
It is not easy to cope after a loved one dies. You will mourn and grieve. Morning is the natural process you go through to accept the loss of loved one. Mourning may include religious traditions honoring the dead or gathering with friends and family to share your loss. Mourninloved one is personal and may last for years. Grieving is the outward expression of your loss. Your grief is likely to be expressed physically, emotionally, and psychologically. For instance, crying is a physical expression, while depression is a psychological expression. It is very important to allow yourself to express these feelings. Often, death is a subject that is avoided, ignored or denied. At first it may seem helpful to separate yourself from the pain, but you cannot avoid grieving forever. Someday those feelings will need to be resolved or they may cause physical or emotional illness. Many people report physical symptoms that accompany grief. Stomach pain, loss of appetite, intestinal upsets, sleep disturbances and loss of energy are all common symptoms of acute grief. Of all life’s stresses, mourning can seriously test your natural defense systems. Existing illnesses may worsen or new conditions may develop.
Most children who experience losing a sibling grieve differently than adults. They may need your help. Often, they are confused about the changes they see taking place around them, particularly if you try to protect them from the truth or from your displays of grief. Limited understanding and an inability to express feelings puts very young children at a special disadvantage. Young children may revert to earlier behaviors (such as bed-wetting), ask questions about the deceased that seem insensitive, invent games about dying or pretend that the death never happened. Coping with a child’s grief puts added strain on a bereaved parent. However, angry outbursts or criticism only deepen a child’s anxiety and delays recovery. Instead, talk honestly with children, in terms they can understand. Take extra time to talk with them about death and the person who has died. Help them work through their feelings and remember that they are looking to adults for suitable behavior.
Profound emotional reactions may occur. These reactions include anxiety attacks, chronic fatigue, depression and thoughts of suicide. An obsession with the deceased is also a common reaction to death.
Coping with death is vital to your mental health. It is only natural to experience grief when a child dies. The best thing you can do is allow yourself to grieve. There are many ways to cope effectively with your pain.
Seek out caring people. Find relatives and friends who can understand your feelings. Join support groups with others who are experiencing similar losses.
Express your feelings. Tell others how you are feeling; it will help you to work through the grieving process.
Take care of your health. Maintain regular contact with your family physician and be sure to eat well and get plenty of rest. Be aware of the danger of developing a dependence on medication or alcohol to deal with your grief.
Accept that life is for the living. It takes effort to begin to live again in the present and not dwell on the past.
Postpone major life changes. Try to hold off on making any major changes, such as moving, remarrying, changing jobs or having another child. You should give yourself time to adjust to your loss.
Helping Others Grieve can be helpful to you. If someone you care about has lost a loved one, you can help them through the grieving process
Seek outside help when necessary. If your grief seems like it is too much to bear, seek professional assistance to help work through your grief. It’s a sign of strength, not weakness, to seek help.
Share the sorrow. Allow them — even encourage them — to talk about their feelings of loss and share memories of the deceased.
Don’t offer false comfort. It doesn’t help the grieving person when you say “it was for the best” or “you’ll get over it in time.” Instead, offer a simple expression of sorrow and take time to listen.
Offer practical help. Baby-sitting, cooking and running errands are all ways to help someone who is in the midst of grieving.
Be patient. Remember that it can take a long time to recover from a major loss. Make yourself available to talk.
Encourage professional help when you feel someone has too much pain to cope alone.
Ways to Cope with the Stress that is brought on by Loss:
Take time for yourself...Smile...Exercise...Do what you love to do...Light a scented candle...Eat properly...Pamper your feet...
Put on your pajamas and relax...Act like a child...Take a whirlpool bath...Play music...Get some fresh air...Be flexible...Sleep late...
Through away your to do list...Prioritize tasks...Reward yourself...Get a message...Go to a museum...Dance....Keep a journal...
Hug somebody...Learn to delegate...Sleep late...Keep a journal...Go to a concert...Get help if you need it...Play with children...
Take a walk...Eat some feel good food... Enjoy a sunrise...Sit in a green or blue room (cool-calming)...Sip on a glass of milk...Knit...
Have a good cry...Watch travel shows...Don’t worry...Find the humor in something...Eat a ice cold treat...Sing a song...Set limits...
Enjoy a sunset...Forgive and forget...Love others...Share jokes...Take a weekend vacation...Play ball...Meditate...Do yoga...
Exercise regularly...Be with positive people...Don’t wear a watch...Visual yourself in a peaceful place...Stand up straight...Watch cartoons...Be kind to others...Drink a cup of green tea...Read a book...Play cards...Daydream..Visit an elderly relative or neighbor...
Create an inner sanctum(a place of peace away from the rest of the world)...Go swimming...Use visualization... Learn to say no...
Get a pet...Rest...Express your feelings...Watch cooking shows...Make love...Have a chocolate...Do crafts...Rent a movie...
Skip the evening news...Watch travel shows...Eat breakfast...Sip a glass of red wine...Lay down on a pink (warm-calming) bed...
Don’t be so neat...Bake bread... Go to a movie...Say thank you often...Don’t be such a perfectionist...Have a cook out...
Have a tea party...Walk barefoot on the beach or in the grass...Go to the zoo...Go to summer camp for adults...Hang a wind chime...
Learn something new...Cocooning (Luxuriate in the midst of silk and velvet pillows.)...Take a nap...Read a book...Write a poem...
Enjoy a board game night...Hang a wind chime... Take a drive...Speak softly...Let yourself off the hook...Don’t let anyone annoy you...
Make a list of why you’re great... Play with your pet...Praise yourself often...Go to an amusement park...Laugh... Go on a picnic...
Get up early to relax before your day...Join a club...Set limits....Do something with a friend...Scream into a pillow...Cut down on caffeine... Fly a kite... Garden...Be happy - you deserve it...Sing...Play an Instument..Daydream... Savor meals.. Volunteer...Simplify your life...
Look at photos...Practice feng shui (Chinese art of placement for positive energy.)...Play soft music...Stargaze...Be faithful.
Listen to your body and take care of it...Have a good time...Go to a poetry reading...Take one minute at a time...Stretch...
Perceive the beauty around you...Take one day at a time...See problems as challenges....and this list goes on.....................

Bereaved Spouse Information Sources:
Young Widow and Widower Support Groups locations at www.youngwidow.org
Young Widow and Widowers Interenet Bulletin Board Support at www.YWBB.org
Military Bereavement Group

Here is an example of a local military bereavement support group that we found using the "Military Bereavement Support Groups" as the key words:
Military Bereavement Group, Watertown Vet Center
210 Court Street, Suite 20, Watertown, NY
Description: The Bereavement Group is an open, ongoing psycho-educational support group for all military surviving spouses and parents who have lost their "loved one." Group participants will receive emotional support and psycho-education related to grief experienced by the loss of a spouse or adult child. Topics such as the process of grief, complicated grief, grief reactions to sudden deaths and the unique experiences of the military spouse and military parent will be discussed. This group is offered bi-weekly.
Start Time: 4:00pm - End Time: 5:30pm - Contact: Watertown Vet Center (866) 610-0358

Use keywords like "Senior Citizens Bereavement Support" to find support for the elderly.

Use keywords like "Spousal Bereavement, Grief Support" to find local spousal support services like this one:
WPO has an on-going Bereavement Support Group that meets on the second and fourth Wednesdays of each month at Sibley Hospital, and a six-week ...
www.sibley.org/community/widowed_persons_outreach.aspx

To find more information online, use keywords such as young widow, elderly bereaved spouse, bereaved spouses, and helping the grieving.

To find a local bereavement support group, contact your local hospital, churches, and elder assistance programs.

The Compassionate Friends Information:
For Bereaved Parents - Also Welcomes Bereaved Siblings
The Compassionate Friends (TCF) is a non-profit, non-sectarian, self help organization offering
compassion, friendship, understanding, and hope for the future to bereaved parents and their families. TCF's primary purpose is to assist the bereaved in the positive resolution of the grief experienced upon the death of a child. TCF suppors their efforts to achieve physical and emotional well-being. TCF provides bereavement information and education to its members. In addition, TCF helps members of the community, including family, friends, employers, co-workers, and professionals to be supportive. There are no dues or fees.
http://www.compassionatefriends.org
National Office: NationalOffice@CompassionateFriends.org
The Compassionate Friends, Inc.
P. O. Box 3696, Oak Brook, IL 60522-3696
Toll-free: 877-969-0010
PH: 630-990-0010
FAX: 630-990-0246

Bereaved Parents of the USA (BP/USA)Information:
For Bereaved Parents - Also Welcomes Bereaved Siblings
BP/USA is a national non-profit self-help group that offers support, understanding, compassion and hope especially to the newly bereaved be they bereaved parents grandparents or siblings struggling to rebuild their lives after the death of their children, grandchildren or siblings. BP/USA is open to all parents, grandparents and siblings regardless of the age Butterflyor the circumstances of the death of their children, grandchildren or siblings. There are no dues or fees to become a member of BP/USA and there are no paid salaries within the organization.
www.bereavedparentsusa.org
http://www.bereavedparentsusa.org/BP_NatlOff.htm
Bereaved Parents of the USA National Office
Post Office Box 95
Park Forest, IL 60466
708-748-7866

Adults Grieving the Death of a Sibling
Within this group of surviving siblings is one that is unique—the adult survivor ... and upon returning to college, the bereaved sibling tends to find little support, ...
www.compassionatefriends.org/brochures/adults_grieving_...

Bereaved Siblings Support Group - SSAFA
Welcome to the Support group for Bereaved Siblings (BSSG) web page. The Bereaved Siblings support group was set up by a group of bereaved families who ...
www.ssafasupportgroups.org.uk/group/bssg

A Review of Sibling Bereavement- Impact and
The bereaved siblings in this study were compared to a group matched on .... specialist help are those where the death is particularly traumatic (Smith 1999).
www.barnardos.org.uk/sibling.pdf

Bereavement Resources and Support
May 22, 2008 ... "All About Me": Sibling Bereavement Packet - Child Life Department, ... It specializes in “email support groups” where peers provide support, ...
www.experiencejournal.com/bereavement/clinic_resources.

To find more information online, use keywords such as bereaved young sibling, adult bereaved sibling, bereaved siblings, and helping the grieving.

To find a local bereavement support group, contact your local hospital, churches, and elder assistance programs.

"Welcome to a Healing Place"You are invited to join the journey of recovering from losses and significant life changes. This is a process that does not occur over night, it may take weeks, months, years, or even a life time-- depending on the person and the type of loss. One doesn't just "get over" loss. There is no "perfect" or "right" or "correct" way to process a loss. Each person's experience, like each grief experience, will be unique. Journey of Hearts was designed to be a Healing Place with resources and support to help those in the grief process following a loss or a significant life change.
http://www.journeyofhearts.org/index.html

Grieving Before Death in Alzheimer's Disease
This helpful article from About's Guide to Alzheimer's Disease, Christine Kennard, explores
some of the bereavement issues that occur as caregivers experience losses as the disease progresses.
http://www.alzheimers.about.com/od/caregiving/a/griefandloss.htm

Try to watch for the signs of suicide in yourself and those around you. Seek help if you see anything. Suicidal Thoughts or Threats: Suicide occurs almost twice as often as murder. Each year, about 32,000 people in the United States die by suicide. In the United States:1 Suicide is the third leading cause of death for people ages 15 to 24 and the second leading cause for people ages 25 to 34. A gun is the most common method of suicide. Suicide rates have increased for females ages 10 to 19 and males ages 15 to 19. Suicide rates have increased for adults older than 65. One suicide death occurs for every 4 suicide attempts.
Women try suicide more often, but men are 4 times more likely to die from a suicide attempt. More information at http://www.webmd.com/mental-health/tc/suicidal-thoughts-or-threats-topic-overview

If you're close to a death due to suicide you can get help by going online, using keywords such as loss due to suicide or grieving a suicide, and helping the grieving. To find a local suicide bereavement support group, contact your local hospital, churches, and elder assistance programs.

Here are the top 10 accidental deaths:
10. Machinery - Deaths per year: 350
We can thank the farmers of America for the inclusion of this particular misfortune as a cause of death. Between corn-huskers and wheat-threshers, is it a wonder? The reason it is last on the list is that there just aren't enough people in farming these days. Ironically, they have all been replaced by machines.
9. Medical & Surgical Complications and Misadventures - Deaths per year: 500
While we are incredibly insensitive people, we did not coin the term "medical misadventure"- the National Safety Council did. How is death by surgeon a "misadventure?" While we're not sure, we suspect that this number refers to elective surgeries that people undertake, such as liposuction.
8. Poisoning by gases - Deaths per year: 700
There's nothing like the smell of napalm in the morning In this category, you mostly have deaths by carbon monoxide poisoning due to faulty operation of a heating or cooking appliance, or a standing automobile.
7. Firearms - Deaths per year: 1,500
We can thank our second amendment rights for all 1500 of these deaths; call it the "right to die" amendment. You probably don't want to know how many countries in the world do not even have "accidental death by firearms" on their top ten, or their top twenty. Suffice it to say that it's most of them. Of the 1500, you're looking at about 75% young males between the age of 14 and 25 (and getting younger every year), who unintentionally shoot themselves or someone else. For more information on the place of guns in society, click over to our pros and cons section.
6. Suffocation - Deaths per year: 3,300
Call this one the "Heimlich" section, as these deaths mostly resulted from blockages of the respiratory system by food or other objects.
5. Fires and burns - Deaths per year: 3,700
This would include deaths resulting from fires, such as smoke inhalation, falling beams, and sitting through Backdraft.
4. Drowning - Deaths per year: 4,000
This includes all sorts of drownings in boat accidents and those resulting from swimming, playing in the water, falling in, or even having a bath.
3. Poisoning by solids and liquids - Deaths per year: 8,600
These would be all your commonly recognized poisons, as well as such items as mushrooms, shellfish, drug overdoses, and problems with medicines-which is a wide category, and why it is so high on the list. What they leave out is things like food poisoning or salmonella, which they classify as "disease deaths" and place on another list.
2. Falls - Deaths per year: 14,900
Then we come to falls from clifts, off buildings, off ladders, down stairs, off decks/porches and sometimes with decks/porches, over curbs, off buses, into manholes, and through plate glass windows.
1. Motor vehicle crashes - Deaths per year: 43,200 The death by car wreck. Head on collision, sideswipe, single-vehicle smash-up, full car rollover, pedestrian takedown, choking on own carsick vomit, spontaneous combustion, etc.
Read more: SoYouWanna the top ten causes of accidental death in America http://www.soyouwanna.com/soyouwanna-top-ten-causes-accidental-death-america-4008-full.html#ixzz1rfuEr75j

Number of deaths: 2,437,163
Death rate: 793.8 deaths per 100,000 population
Life expectancy: 78.5 years
Infant Mortality rate: 6.39 deaths per 1,000 live births

Heart disease: 599,413
Cancer: 567,628
Chronic lower respiratory diseases: 137,353
Stroke (cerebrovascular diseases): 128,842
Accidents (unintentional injuries): 118,021
Alzheimer's disease: 79,003
Diabetes: 68,705
Influenza and Pneumonia: 53,692
Nephritis, nephrotic syndrome, and nephrosis: 48,935
Intentional self-harm (suicide): 36,909

Ischaemic heart disease 7.25 12.8%
Stroke and other cerebrovascular disease 6.15 10.8%
Lower respiratory infections 3.46 6.1%
Chronic obstructive pulmonary disease 3.28 5.8%
Diarrhoeal diseases 2.46 4.3%
HIV/AIDS 1.78 3.1%
Trachea, bronchus, lung cancers 1.39 2.4%
Tuberculosis 1.34 2.4%
Diabetes mellitus 1.26 2.2%
Road traffic accidents

Need more help?
If you are a bereaved person or
someone wanting to help a bereaved person,
we can help.
For more information,
contact Peter or Deb at 1-978-343-4009,
Help@BereavementAwareness.com.
You can also write to us at Peter and Deb Kulkkula,
381 Billings Road, Fitchburg, MA 01420-1407.
If we can't help you, we'll connect you with someone who can.

Bereavement Spokesperson Deb Kulkkula
Bereaved Parent, Inspirational Writer and Speaker and
Bereavement Spokesperson Peter Kulkkula
Bereaved Parent, Bereaved Sibling, American Adventurer

Although we have no bereavement degrees, we have lost two children,
my husband lost his brother, and my sister, mother, and neice lost their husbands.
We worked with and led our local chapter o
The Compassionate Friends (for bereaved parents and their families)
for many years after the organization helped us.
I edited newsletters, wrote articles,
and was the education chair of the 2005 Annual TCF Conference.
We are very grateful to The Compassionate Friends.

At the same time, Deb lead a group of writers.
They first wrote a brochure entitled
"Reaching Out to Help the Bereaved"
Lovingly Written by
Jane K. Andrews - in loving memory of Peter John Kulkkula,
Bonny Caisse - in loving memory of Jared James Caisse,
Anne M. Dionne - in loving memory of Michael S. Dionne,
Deborah L. Kulkkula -in loving memory of Peter John Kulkkula,
Jane Maki - in loving memory of Christopher L. Maki.
Lovingly Designed and Compiled by
Deborah L. Kulkkula - in loving memory of Peter John Kulkkula.
Lovingly Created Artwork in the hard copy by
Kelly A. Dionne - in loving memory of Michael S. Dionne
We appreciate your loving attention to this brochure.

Then, co-wrote a book entitled
Every Step of the Way: How four mothers coped with child loss
with Yvonne Lancaster, Anne Dionne, Jane Maki.
Thank you: Yvonne, Anne, and Jane.

We are both dedicated to helping the bereaved.
Since 2008, we have been sponsoring bereavement months
to show the general public how to reach out and help the bereaved,
support the newly bereaved,
and to connect the newly bereaved with a helpful organization.

Site designed by Deb Kulkkula
Donated by Rising Star Speakers and Peter and Deb Kulkkula
In loving memory of Peter John Kulkkula, Quy Dan Ha Vo,
David Lydon, Harold F. LeBouf, Elma & Ansu Kulkkula
©2008, 2009, 2010, 2011, 2012, 2913 Rising Star Publishing
For more information,contact
Deb Kulkkula, M Ed, M B A, Hon Ph D
381 Billings Road, Fitchburg, MA 01420-1407.
Help@BereavementAwareness.com
or at 1-978-343-4009.